Kimputer's Weblog

When a movie starts off with a bar dancing Ashley Judd, hopes can rise through the roof. An established actress like her, the mystery on screen is a difficult one to figure out. And I don’t mean the serial killer in the story, I mean Ashley actually reading the script, and choosing this role. The trailer makes it look like the next Seven wannabe, but it doesn’t even come near a bad episode of Profiler. If Ashley does method acting, I wonder in which Alzheimer’s Institute she’s been. (What follows here might be considered as a breaking of my sacred non-spoiler reviewing rule, but for a bad movie like this, it wouldn’t make any difference). I wonder what goes around in her head when she has to act suprised again, after not the second, not the third, but the FIFTH time she drinks from her drugged wine and dozes off, only to wake up in shock, AGAIN. What a waste of talent. For now, I see writer Sarah Thorp has nothing lined up for the future, and I hope it stays that way. Let’s drink some drugged wine to that.3½.

As exciting it is to see Halle Berry in a tight leather clad, the rest of the movie is certainly not. Pitof’s focus on the CGI city skyline, and fly-by left-right swinging camera moves clearly shows he chose visuals above content. A big mistake, as a short Axe commercial provides better story and more entertainment. The dialogues are cold and unmeaningful, and the schizo Patience/Catwoman character is not worth an Oscar winning actress’ time. While there are more movies in this “miss” catagory, most are still watcheable, but this one has an underlying boredom creeping out slowly, thereby winning an “avoid at all cost” title.3+.

as I’m away from the internet and I’m writing on my iPAQ, let me use another approach than the usual.

Dear Weblog,
this is a story about London, and it goes a little bit like this.

Rate 1 (FR#^&% MESS !) to 5 (how very tidy !). Only rate the latest picture, otherwise I can’t keep track of the average.

Total: 1173 out of 353 votes > Average is: 3.323

Still tired from the trip. And all I got was this funny tagline. ‘Cept it’s only funny to the most savage Underground travellers, which most of you are not.

Exorcist: The Beginning (well, actually, the second beginning, as the complete movie was reshot by a Renny Harlin, after Paul Schrader was fired after he completed a thriller with more psychologically aspects instead of the pints of blood the producers wanted) starts off pretty well with $18.2 million.
Teen comedy Without a Paddle, paddles to a number 2 spot with $13.7 million. More fun for teens was to be found at number 3, where The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement cashes in $13.2 million in its second week.
At the 4th spot, Alien vs. Predator proves signals from outer space degrade almost as fast as the speed of light, with only $12.5 million catched by the satellites in its second week.

I need some time off. I’m tired. So, keep yer pants on, the pictures are on their way, it just might take a few days.

Almost needless to say, M. Night Shyamalan does it again. Like his previous movies, he combines a rich history with a bit of drama and humor, while the scare factor builds up slowly in the background. Instead of the mindless scare movies you’ve seen lately, mr. Shyamalan builds the scare from the inside, with cunning psychologically tricks, which are at least consequent (with some help from well-cued sound effects, and a score by James Newton Howard). As always, some people will not like the surprise ending, but even then, it’s still has been a movie to enjoy.8-.

One last request before I’m off with the train.

Could you guys dance around a bit for me ? You know, and shout things like “hooba hooba hooba” and stuff ? No, I don’t mean a raindance, I’m in need of a sundance.

Unexpected, I’m leaving for vacation. Most people with weblogs will throw in a few links and fancy pictures just after they’ve planned their holiday, weeks before. My destination, however, is not that awe inspiring. It’s London. It’s not that special, if you squint your eyes, and look the to west, you might actually see me waving back at ya.
So here’s a list of what I’m certain I’m going to do:

– Sleep in till late afternoon. I hope the hotel serves breakfast at 14:00.
– Watch a lot of BBC1 and BBC2. If the hotel has a receiver for BBC Digital (including BBC3 through 5), I def’ly won’t complain. During traveling, I’ll tune in my iRiver radio to BBC World.
– Have tea at 4 o’clock.
– Listen to the Big Ben.
– Buy a can of Pringles at Harrod’s.

The rest of the time, I’ll try to blend in as poifectly as possible. I already have the magically bad set of teeth the Brits are cursed to have, with the color being a close match.
Then there’s the British accent, which I’ve mastered a long time ago. “Woh-evaah, mate, woh-evaah. Kewd yew yost pawz the marwmelade ?”

Anyways, I’ll be back before you know it. 4 Days, of which only two count (Friday and Monday), coz I’m still a workaholic at heart, you know. I even thought about bringing along my set of emergency boot floppies and cd’s. Ah well, you know what, I’m gonna be bold and leave them at home. Toym to have somm fonn, sholwe ?

“_Another_ superhero movie ?” you might be thinking. Well, yeah, they’re kinda popular these days, and they usually make big money. This time it’s not from the two biggest names (Marvel and DC), but it’s from Dark Horse Comics. Their track record hasn’t been a clean one, with only one memorable entry (The Mask) standing out from the failures (Barb Wire). Enter Hellboy, the first to have this real superhero comic feeling (and a modest budget to match). Headed by the original comic writer Mike Mignola and a determined director, Guillermo del Toro (who turned down bigger movies for this one), you’d might think something special would result from this duo. Too bad though, titles like X-Men and Spider-man wipe the floor with anything mediocre, and its standards are too high to match. What you get instead is a somewhat simple outline, with simple character design. With a tiny bit of exploration, you just don’t get enough out of it. The reasons and motivations are non-existent, making for bland superheros and supervillains. The special effects are admirable for this kind of tight budgets though. And globally, it’s still entertaining. But when you think about it, you still wonder how Hellboy 2 came to life (tentative release 2006).7.

Rate 1 (sucks) to 5 (cool). Only rate the latest pictures, otherwise I can’t keep track of the average.

Total: 619 out of 189 votes > Average is: 3.275

This whole PC needs a double dose of Nico-10-e B-Gone.

I always liked Kevin Smith, and this movie would prove his worthiness indefinitely (again writing and directing it all by himself, while helping with producing and editing), as this is the first movie to break away from his usual strange comedy style. Not surprising that he takes a veteran to star (Ben Affleck starred in many Kevin Smith movies) in this break-away stunt. Ben is, of course, besides a capable actor, a natural charmer, making him a perfect fit for this movie. Starring as his kid, is big eyed adorable Raquel Castro, another perfect fit for the role. Add to that Liv Tyler, with her disarming smile and attitude, as a potential love interest, and it’s almost complete (other minor characters are quite acceptable too). To complete it, there are quite few funny cameos thrown in.
They all play out a simple story, which would’ve been bad, if Kevin didn’t flesh it out with meaty dialogue. He doesn’t even shy away from a few cliches here and there, which would have been bad, if he didn’t throw in a few thought provoking subjects in the mix. He even proves he has good tear jerking qualities. In the end, all is well, and change isn’t a bad thing after all. I’d say, serve up The Green Hornet and Fletch Won whenever you’re ready.7½.

Oprah Winfrey is gonna make some big bucks. And I don’t mean her extending her contract till 2011 (after renegotiating her 2006 deal), no, I mean the $17.20 she’s gonna make per day.
Chosen as a jury member (out of 300 potential jurors), she will have to sit through 3 days of trials. Besides granted the use of the side entrance, no other special treatment will be allowed. No mic, no camera in the juryroom. Too bad. I bet though, she’ll be chosen to act as the madame foreperson.

Bad reviews from everywhere, even some streaming in from outerspace through the SETI satellites, didn’t stop Alien vs. Predator from making bigger bugs, I mean bucks, than their previous solo movies. Alien 3 topped at $19.5 million, while Predator did it with $12 million. Teamed up together though, they’re good for $38.3 million.
Second place is for Princess Diaries 2: The Royal Engagement. It’s every young girls’ dream, so it earns a hefty $23.0 million. Collateral drops to number 3, though only a 35% drop, with $16.0 million. For young boys, there was Yu-Gi-Oh!, another Japanese trading card thingy, i.e. another major headache for parents. A $9.4 million headache, to be exact. Good enough for a number 4 spot.

Rate 1 (FR#^&% MESS !) to 5 (how very tidy !). Only rate the latest picture, otherwise I can’t keep track of the average.

Total: 1173 out of 353 votes > Average is: 3.323

I live here in my own cozy home for two and a half years now, and I never noticed it. Until yesterday, when I accidentally looked at it from a certain angle under a certain lighting condition. Apparently, I also have to vacuum the wall every year or so !