Kimputer's Weblog

2 Things are good:
Me as a cook.
And outlets. You know, the big megastores that are open till 18.00.
And how do those two facts combine into a story ? Well, last night my microwave/oven/grill combo died a bit more (it already was showing clear signs of breakdown), all the way to zero usefulness. Ten years ago, you’d have to either take a day off, or wait till the weekend to buy a new one. Nowadays, you have big malls just a few steps away, so after work you pop in, and you pop out. You don’t even have to pay your parking ticket if you keep it under 15 minutes. So, that’s why I didn’t miss a day’s worth of cookin’. While a microwave/oven/grill combo is not a necessity, it certainly is handydandy.
So, for all of you who haven’t been to electronics store lately, guess how much my new LG (MC7683D) was.

Kiddy pic Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed made top honors with $30.7 million. Deservedly 43% less than the original opening.
The Coen brothers helming The Lady Killers remake, stars Tom Hanks, ranked 2, with $13 million. The Passion of the Christ still hangs on with bloody hands, it’s third with $12.5 million.
As to be expected, dawn will be setting soon on horror remake Dawn of the Dead, a 61% drop to $10.3 million. Jersey Girl, the first mainstream movie that Kevin Smith is helming, with Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler starring, opens a bit disappointing at number 5, only $8.3 million.

Rate 1 (sucks) to 5 (cool). Only rate the latest pictures, otherwise I can’t keep track of the average.

Total: 496 out of 151 votes > Average is: 3.285

“Helleuw, my name is Stock….Private Stock.”

Another one of those so called horror dead people blablablablabla. In short, the movie is so dull, I can’t even write a sensible review for it. The plot is as transparent as a, let’s say, clear glass window. The scare tactics involve shocking images at expected times, combined with high volume sound effects. Still bored. Then you have the screaming Halle Berry character, who doesn’t do much more then, well, just screaming. Still no fun. Everything combined, is a big total boring blob of nothingness.
In essence, another black spot for the once so great Robert Zemeckis (producer), who failed big time with What Lies Beneath, and does it all over again in this What Lies Beneath 2. If you fancied the first one, and don’t mind a repeat show, this is for you. Otherwise, scream as loud as Halle Berry can, and stay clear from this one.3.

Having Stephen King’s stamp on something must mean something, you might think. For this TV series, where he does a rewrite of Lars von Trier’s original (both doin’ executive producer duties), he does know how to write weird.
As a TV series, I can already say it’s a misser. With nothing episodic to be seen (which doesn’t matter too much, serially written series are mostly the best), it’s also too damn slow. Also, with serialisation comes the opportunity for complicated stories, with enough time and depth for character development. However, here you wait for complicated stories, but you keep waiting and waiting. As for the characters, they’re nothing short of caricatures, probably as a device for comic relief. The problem with that is that after the character has been munched that way, they can’t be used for drama or anything else. Not believable at least. Without that, the scariness is gone too.
The only thing that’s consistent (besides the dropping ratings, week by week), is that’s everything is weird. So what ? All in all, in medical terms: definitely a goner.

Not a day has gone by, without anybody saying _something_ about Gibson’s The Passion of the Christ, and it makes the headlines. As I’m not bound by news-worthiness, I’m doing the same thing. Here’s the tally so far:

Cons:

– Germany’s Roman Catholic and Protestant as well as the Jewish community (they rarely pair up, let alone threesome) saying it’s pure anti-Semitism.
– Paula Fredriksen, one of the professors asked to review an incomplete script for the news hungry New York Times.
– Paul Schrader, screenwriter for “The Last Temptation of Christ” (directed by Martin Scorsese in 1985) says it’s disturbing. Said by the guy, of all people, who showed Jesus having sex with Lady Magdelane.
-Gerald Kaufman, a member of Britain’s governing Labour Party and chair of the House of Commons Culture, Media and Sport committee.
– French film leading independent cinema groups (small)

Pros:

+ Yasser Arafat says it’s not Anti-Semitic, hailed the film as “moving and historical”.
+ Several Polish bishops and priests
+ Catholic leaders in Brazil, the world’s biggest Roman Catholic country, saying it was “accurate and deeply emotional and its violence showed Jesus’ strength”
+ Polish bishops and priests
+ Thomas Nelson Inc. The world’s largest publisher of religious material (sales of repackaged bibles and current themed magazines have surged through the roof, almost all the way up to heaven)
+ French film leading distributor (big)

And last but not least, the smart guys:

o The Pope, saying very contentless, after a prive screening, “It is, as it is”
o Steven Spielberg, acknowledging his own smartness with being “too smart to answer a question like that” when asked for comment on this matter

Note that I’m not under one of those headings, as I’m trying to avoid the savagery during the premiere here (religion can invoke some pretty high emotions y’know), and chose for a quieter spot the week after.

Rate 1 (FR#^&% MESS !) to 5 (how very tidy !). Only rate the latest picture, otherwise I can’t keep track of the average.

Total: 1018 out of 292 votes > Average is: 3.486

Yeah yeah, I know, a clear case of product placement. But hey, what can I say. As a semi-unofficial Pringles spokesperson, I’m fishing for a lifetime discount (or better yet, a lifetime supply).

Horror remake Dawn of the Dead scared the bejesus out of Christ (pun intended), taking over the nr. 1 spot with $27.3 million. Passion hung on to the second place with another $19.2 million.
Finishing the R-rated top 3 (a rare occasion) is Angelina Jolie starrer Taking Lives with $11.4 million.
Another debut, Eternal Shunshine of the Spotless Mind, a drama featuring Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet opened with $8.6 million on the sixth place. A somewhat disappointing number.

Cliches were definitely cheaper by the dozen in this movie, as there are tons of it to be found here. The most of the comedy bits are only mildly amusing. The drama bits fail miserably. And there’s no acting to speak of. While I thought, during the first half, the chaos alone, would keep me busy, it was all too generic to make an impression.
With talks already for a sequel, I wonder if they’d be able to come up with something called… a story.5+.

Looking around on this windy day, I cannot keep my mouth shut anymore, when the truth should be out there.
But first, check these links for a history lesson. Link 1 | Link 2
So, since the early 17th century, they’ve been used eh ? So what happened after some 300 years ? THIS:

(These pictures aren’t gathered over the years. No, these were taken in one day, just strolling around the block, doin’ groceries.)

Yupz, a gush of wind, even as low as windforce 4 on the scale of Beaufort, and it’s over. You have to buy yourself a new one again. So here’s the theory. They (the manufacturers) make them so weak, you have to keep buying them.
Let’s be honest, how many have you bought in the last year (no, you lazy car drivers, don’t answer. This question is only for the hard working pedestrian) ?
Then the next question is, what can we do about this horible conspiracy ?

Having to sift through just about a thousand of my filtered messages in my spam mailbox (Yeah, a spam filter isn’t all that. While it has not happened till now, you still have to go through it to pick out false positives. Just to be sure), these were the funniest subject lines:

INC*R_EASE YOUR D`I-C*K WEIGHT …

What function would that have, I wonder ?

WinXP, Office, Autodesk, Adobe OEM Cristmas sale

Yeah well, just because Mel Gibson’s The Passion of the Crist is hitting the movie theatres, doesn’t make it Cristmas just yet, y’know !

Ben Stiller is clearly THE man for romantic comedies these past few years, and of course, as a comedian, it’s all deserved. In any movie he’s in, there are at least a few laugh out loud moments. You can safely bet your grandma’s set of teeth on that.
Same goes for this one. Along with Philip Seymour Hoffman he sets the tone. A couple of supporting actors, and you have yourself a movie. The characters are well defined. The romantic relationship, however, is not so well endowed. It’s going too fast, while being very predictable, so it feels unnatural. While the pace at which things moves is okay, there’s no real story to speak of. That leaves you with only the fun moments that are scattered all over.6½.

Yupz, she’s back. Janet Whoopson. Her new song from her new album has been released today and the videoclip can be seen here.
The song itself, I Want You, from her upcoming album Damita Jo (Damita who ?), is a slow paced, too laid back love song that best fits the nineties. Too bad we’re already in the 21st century.
Worst of all, in the video, she’s doing a walking, talking to herself thingy, with ALL her clothes ON at ALL times ! Can you imagine my disappointment ?

Happy birthday to the two cats there. Those brothers just turned NINE !! In cat years, they’re kinda old. But trust me when I use this Dutch saying, very inappropiately. They’re still fit as a fish.

It took her a few years, but she’s finally there. Because, when she didn’t cancel a concert, the front row could enjoy a snowy show, white powder twirling downwards. From her nose.
Yeah, Whitney Houston is going to rehab. Hopefully she’ll get her life back together. Her lil’ daughter already has dad, Bobby Brown, constantly in jail. Guess having celebrity parents isn’t that much fun after all.